Mini Vacation
by whiterabbitinshibuya
Summary: The Kingdom Hearts Gang decides to go on "Mini Vacations" Very OC stupidness occurs.
1. Chapter 1

**Disclaimer: I do not own Kingdom Hearts but if I did I would be the happiest person in the world and I would start working on KH3 right away.**

A/N: um sorry if you don't like this style of writing but I wrote this a few months ago so I want to see how well it does I only have the first two chapters written so I'll change it kay? Hope you enjoy the stupidity that is mini vacation.

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Namine: I'm bored

Kairi: Me too lets do something.

Roxas: Like what?

Kairi: Sora lets do something.

Sora: Okay but what?

Namine: Let's have a mini vacation.

Riku: What the hell is that?

Kairi: We get to choose any place we want to go

Namine: And we stay there as long as we want.

Kairi: See doesn't it sound like fun?

(Axel and Demyx burst into the room, that the gang is in, for a surprise attack but then Demyx falls on Axels pointy circle thingies and starts running around 'cause there stuck in his ass and they really hurt or so he says…)

Demyx: Owwwww my ass!!!! They really hurt! Axel

damn you and your pointy circle thingies!

(Kairi and Namine pull the pointy circle thingies out of his ass)

Sora: Hey guys we were about to go on a mini

vacation we're kinda busy.

Axel: Hey that sounds like fun can we come?

Riku & Roxas: Hell no!!!

(Demyx and Axel get all depressed and go to leave the room)

(Namine hits Riku and Roxas over the head with her sandal)

Riku & Roxas: Owwwww What the hell!!

(Kairi runs up to Axel and Demyx and stops them from leaving)

Kairi and Namine: Yea you guys can come----

(Kairi and Namine get glomped by Axel and Demyx)

Kairi: Ahhhhhhh! Demyx!

Demyx: Thank you Thank you Thank you!

Kairi: No problem but can you do me a favor?

Demyx: Anything my dear sweet Kairi.

Kairi: Can you let go of me…I can't breathe.

Axel: Yyyyyyyyyyyaaaaaaaaaaayyyyyyy!!!!!

(Namine has just gone deaf' cause Axel screamed in her ear)

Namine: Owwwwwww.

Axel: Noooooooooo my dear sweet Namine

Is hurt!!!!

Demyx: So is my sweet Kairi!!

Axel & Demyx: nooooooooooooooooooooooo

The world is so cruel!!!!

Riku: Uhhh guys…

(Axel and Demyx are running around screaming for the loss of Kairi and Namine)

Sora: GUYS!!

(There still not listening)

Roxas: LOSERS!!!!!

(Demyx and Axel turn around)

Axel: What?

Demyx: Can't you see we're mourning the loss of

our loved ones??

Kairi and Namine: (confused) but we're right

here.

(Axel and Demyx go to glomp Kairi and Namine but the Hayner, Pence and Olette burst into the room to stop them….but it was really 'cause they were bored)

Olette: Stop there shall be no glomping on my

watch!

Hayner: What the hell was that??

Pence: She's read too many shojo mangas…

Hayner: Clearly…..

(Hayner looks at Olette who apparently is acting like sailor moon…or any of the sailor scouts)

Sora: Ahh I see…

(Riku looks at Pence and then Hayner)

Riku: What did I tell you two about giving Olette

meth!?!?

Hayner & Pence: We're sorry

(Olette is totally off the feeling of meth)

Olette: Owwwwwwwwwwwww what

Happened?

Sora: oh nothing nothing…we were about

To go on a mini vacation…

(Hayner, Pence and Olette go all puppy eyed on the gang)

Roxas: Okay guys that's not gonna work

(He looks at the eyes…dumbass)

Roxas: no…I mean it no…I

(Olette goes all teary eyed)

Roxas: Fine…just no more moping

Olette: yayyyyy!!!!!!!

Sora: Okay then….well who picks first?

Riku: Well how about Kairi or Namine it was there

Idea.

Sora: Okay so who goes first out of them?

Kairi: Namine should first.

Namine: Why?

Kairi: Cause I have no clue where I want to go.

Sora: I knew it you never know where you want

to go.

Kairi: Shut up.

(Kairi and Sora get into a fight everyone just stares at them then Riku looks at Namine)

Riku: So, where do you want to go?

Namine: Um iono I guess um….

(She's feeling pressure…yup)

Namine: um…uhhh Sora!

(Sora looks up but he's still totally getting his ass kicked by Kairi)

Sora: What did I do now!?

Namine: You go first I haven't decided yet…

Sora: Why is it that girls can't decide where to

go?

(All the girls that are in the room stare at him and he gets lots of evil glares)

Sora: Okay I'm sorry!!

Riku: Just pick a damn place!

Sora: I want to go to HALLOWEEN TOWN.

Roxas: That was dramatic…

Demyx: Well what are we waiting for?

Let's blow this popsicle joint!

Axel: Yeah!!

(Everyone starts to walk to the gummi ship)

Demyx: Kairi Kairi sit next to me!

Kairi: Umm o-okay

Axel: Namine sit next to me too!

Namine: Sure

Riku: I think you have some competition Sora…

Sora?

(Sora has millions of anger marks on his forehead)

Roxas: Okay that's scary

Riku: Yea and I've seen some pretty scary things

on the dark side…Xemnas for one.

Roxas: Yea try being in the room with Axel and

Larxene are making out in. I thought Axel

was gonna get his face sucked off.

Sora: Shut up and let's go!

Roxas: Something tells me this mini vacation is

not gonna go to well…

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so peoples everyone is off to Halloween Town so yea hope you liked it and just to let you know that many strange things will occur so ha!!!

Namine: WHAT THE HELL WAS THAT!!

Kairi: What what!?

Namine: Never mind

Kairi: no tell me damnit!!!!!!!

Namine: Ehhh you'll find out later.

(Namine walks away)

Kairi: NO TELL ME NOW DAMNIT!!!

(Kairi runs after Namine)

Kairi: Sorry people's g2g

Sora: Please review…Kairi don't kill Namine!!!


	2. not so graceful landing

**Disclaimer: As I think everyone knows I do not own Kingdom Hearts…just rub it in you stupid Disclaimer.**

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Halloween Town.

Axel: Hey Sora..?

(Sora was still totally pissed off at Axel and Demyx for taking Kairi and Namine away from him but it's his own damn fault cause he can't chose so yea xp)

(Sora glares at Axel)

Sora: What?

Axel: Why did you want to go to Halloween

Town?

Sora: Because I did.

Olette: Okay Sora jeeze you didn't have to be

rude

Demyx: Yeah Mr. Cranky Butt xp

(Kairi and Namine start laughing)

Riku: Come on guys Soras just a little cranky I

mean--

(Riku gets the death glare from Sora)

Riku: umm I mean Roxas help me out here

(Roxas is totally not caring and reading his magazine)

Roxas: Dude I don't think there's anything I can

add at this point.

(Riku is desperately trying to find a way out of the conversation)

Riku: Uhhh umm look its Halloween Town!!

Demyx: Yea!!!

(He grabs Kairi's hand and starts dancing on the gummi ship which is pretty small to begin with and bumping into Sora the entire time wasn't helping)

Kairi: Demyx! What are you doing?

Sora: He's stepping on my foot.

(Demyx gets the death glare from Sora and hides behind Riku, yea that helps)

Demyx: AHHHHHHHH DON'T EAT ME!!!!!

(Sora pulls his keyblade out and tries to go after Demyx, he trips over Axels pointy circle thingies (seriously if someone knows what their called let me know) and falls into Olettes pudding)

Olette: AHHHHHHH!!!!! MY PUDDING! MY

DELICIOUS PUDDING!!!

Sora: what the hell were you eating pudding

for? Wait where'd you get that?

(Olette is on the floor sobbing and saying it wasn't yet the puddings time to go.)

Olette: YOU B$TRD!!!! HOW COULD YOU KILL

MY SWEET SWEET JOSE DE PANCHO!!!!!

Riku: GOD DAMNIT HAYNER!!!

(Hayner's trying to sneak off the gummi ship cause he knows he's gonna get in trouble…he gave Olette shrooms…)

Hayner: What?? I was bored…

(Hayner starts rambling on about how the ride to Halloween town was boring and that he was going to die if he didn't do anything and yadda yadda yadda yadda yadda)

Pence: OMG YOU GUYS LOOK OUT THE WINDOW!

(Everyone freaks out and runs to the window to see…. insert drum roll here NOTHING!! OHHH AHHHH GASP neways)

Kairi: Hayner…did you give him shrooms too?

Hayner: maybe…that depends who wants to

Know?

(Hayner's wearing like this trench coat thingy and has smoking weed I guess…yea sure why not.)

(Riku is totally pissed at Hayner cause they've had the "drugs are bad for you" conversation many times before… guess it didn't work…)

Kairi: I want to know you dumbass!!!

Hayner: then yes…yes I am.

(Kairi, Namine, Sora, Roxas, Demyx and Axel are all buying drugs and getting high…….what happened to moral values? Riku: You're the one writing this dumbass!! Kairi-i-love-sora: don't call me a dumbass I'll make you gay!!! Riku: nooooo okay carry on )

Riku: WHAT IS WRONG WITHYOU PEOPLE? DRUGS

ARE----

(Sora cuts him off and starts hitting on him)

Sora: Hey there hot stuff… come here often?

(He winks at Riku)

Riku: Sora... are you hitting on me?

Sora: hee hee you're cute

(He puts his hand on Riku's chest and tries to kiss him)

Riku: AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

HHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

HHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

THIS IS WRONG! THIS IS SO, SO WRONG!!!!!!!!!

(He runs off the gummi ship screaming like a little girl Sora and the gang stare at him like he's crazy)

Sora: CALL ME!!!!!

Okay umm I know its not that long and the don't get to Halloween town yet but it was something I came up with during psat testing last week so I hope you enjoyed reading it, neway I'll try to do better on the next chapie. And I'm writing a new story I don't know what to call it yet, but it's kinda dark. Oh and if someone can tell me how to write stuff on my info page I'll write more about it, cause I don't know how to put stuff on there. Neways thanx4reading

kairi-i-love-sora


	3. we're here

**Disclaimer: **um yea I'm sure we all know I do not own kingdom hearts…Kairi-i-love-sora goes and jumps off a cliff

Roxas: Damn it you stupid disclaimer! Who's gonna write the story now?

Sora: It's over man! Game over!

Kairi-I love-sora: Oi guys I'm just joking!

(Sora and Roxas look over at Kairi-i-love-sora)

Roxas: Yayyyyyy

(Sora and Roxas start to cry)

Sora: We thought the story was done for.

(Kairi-i-love-sora gets hit over the head for faking her death)

Kairi-i-love-sora: Alright I get it

Sora: Say it.

Kairi-i-love-sora: I won't fake my death for the sake of the fans.sigh

Roxas: That's what I thought.

Sora: ON WITH THE STORY!!

Sora: ABC AS EASY AS 123!!!

Riku: Sora first you hit on me then you sing bad versions of pop songs from the 70's

Kairi: WHAT HAS THE WORLD COME TO!!!!

(As soon as Kairi asked Chip and Dale literally hurled the KH gang of the gummi ship with their stubby little hands…I would hate to get in a fight with them…)

Olette: Ahhhhhhhhhhhh

(Olette has once again been given meth…and when the chipmunks threw the gang out of the gummi ship she landed on her pudding…you know Jose de Pancho…. Yea he's back from the dead. And he bought weapons)

Olette: NOOOOOO JOSE DE PANCHO DON'T LEAVE PLEEZE…

(we all know tha this love wasn't meant to last so her sweet Jose de pancho pudding cup exploded into a million pieces…and just so everyone has lots of fun she tried to kill herself with a whoopee cushion…I wonder how she keeps getting this stuff……)

Pence: Olette what are you doing with that

Olette: I don't want to live anymore it's not the same without Jose!!!

(She blows up the whoopee cushion and threatens that if anyone comes any closer that she'll sit on it)

Riku: Olette you don't want to do this...

Olette: Try and stop me!!!

Pence: I know that this is hard for you Olette but what would Jose have wanted you to do? Olette…put the whoopee cushion down

(Olette gets all teary eyed and soon after gets off the affects of high….that was really short but dont worrie we all know she'll get high again really soon Riku: Do you get your laughs at our expense? Kairi-i-love-sora shoves Hayner in a tiger cage and watches him scream like a girl Kairi-i-love-sora:…no… )

Sora: Okay so can we go now…..

Riku: I don't know lets do a head count first

(Send your hate mail…All the guys pull down their pants)

Namine: AHHHHHHHHH I'M BLIND

Kairi: IT BBBBBUUUUUUUURRRRRRRRRNNNNNNNNNSSSSSSS!!!!!!!

(Riku shakes his head in frustration as he tells the guys to pull their pants up)

Sora: Awwwwww poor Riku

Riku: What?

Demyx: Yea it was too much manliness for him…

(Millions of anger marks pop up on Riku's forehead)

Riku: HOW MANY TIMES DO I HAVE TO TELL YOU I'M NOT GAY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Axel: Aww its okay Riku don't be mad because your hand cuffed to a bed

Namine:…..when did they handcuff him?

Kairi: how'd they get that bed out here?

Olette: how come there naked?

(As the girls ponder this Jack comes along to see how there doing)

Jack: Hello I heard some screaming and I was wondering if you needed any help?

Riku: HHHHHHHHEEEEEEEEELLLLLLLLLLLLLPPPPPPPPPP!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

(Jack, Namine, Kairi, and Olette look over to seeWe interrupt this program to bring you Courage the Cowardly Dog show starring Courage the Cowardly Dog, abandoned as a pup, he was found by Muriel who lives in the middle of nowhere with her husband Eustace Bags.)

Kairi: AHHHHHHHHHH NOW THEIR

(But creepy stuff happens in nowhere it's up to courage to save his new home)

Kairi: You know that was really kinky

Namine: Yea Riku-chan… I never knew that you were like that

(Riku gets really mad and mumbles something about how he'll get back those high homosexual jerks for doing this to himNOTE I have no problem with gay or lesbian people in reality my god sister is gay and some of my best friends are too)

Jack: So Sora what brings you here?

Sora: Oh I wanted to see …Roxas drum roll pleeze.

Roxas: Oh yea cause all i'm good for is drum rolls…

(Roxas stands on top of the gummi ship and throws off a giant drum and it crushes Olettes new love interest Billy Bob Tapioca… and it slowly rolls in front of the gang)

Kairi: THAT WAS A SUCKEY DRUMROLL ROXAS!!!!

Roxas: YEA WELL LET ME SEE YOU TRY IT BITCH!!!!

Kairi: EXCUSE ME YOU DID NOT JUST SAY THAT!!

Sora: Guys…. (Get all teary eyed) but that was my drum roll…

Namine: Right…KARI, ROXAS STOP BITCHING!!!!!! As you were saying.

(Everyone stares at Namine cause no one thinks she cusses but let me tell you something, there's another side of my other only a select few know about her its not pretty…… Kairi-i-love-sora hides in the corner of a circular room )

Sora: Anyways, as I was saying I want to see SANTA CLAUSE!!!!!

(Jack bows his head and looks at Sora with sad eyes)

Sora: Jack…what happened

Jack: I'm sorry Sora but you can't handle the truth…

Sora: What happened…Jack you know you can tell me anything…

(This whole scene is all daytime TV. Drama so dramatic music is in the background and everyone is swimming in a pool full of pity)

Jack: I'm sorry to have to inform you about this Sora…but Santa is no longer with us

Sora: NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO HE CANT BE GONE HOW ARE THE CHIDREN OF THE WORLD GONNA HAVE CHRISTMAS WITH OUT SANTA CLAUSE.

(The entire Kingdom Hearts group stares as Sora pulls a Sponge Bob and does that whole crying thing like in grandma's kisses….)

Jack: (confused) Sora…he went on vacation he won't be back for two weeks sorry you came for nothing

Sora: Okay well I guess we'll go somewhere else…come on guys lets go

(The gang walks back to the gummi ship and waves goodbye to jack but Riku is still super pissed)

Riku: This is total bull!!! I get butt raped and were just gonna go somewhere else

Sora: yea…

Riku: WELL I'M NOT MOVING

Kairi: well he's not here Riku-chan

Riku: WELL YOU BETTER HOPE THAT FAT MAN GETS HERE SOON CAUSE I'M NOT MOVING!!!!!

(Out of nowhere Santa comes flying down from the sky and crash lands on Riku and instantly flies away again.)

Namine: Riku!!!!!

Kairi: Riku got run over by a reindeer

Namine: That's mean….

(Everyone including Billy Bob Tapioca sing Kumbaya…well I don't know how Billy Bob managed to do that but he did.)

NEXT STOP

Castle Oblivion

HA sorry it took so long to update but it took a really long time to type this out…but to all those Riku fans out there I'm sorry

Riku: You should be!!

Kairi-i-love-sora: Okay honestly why are you complaining? We used a stunt double…. And that stunt double would like to remain unnamed… well he really doesn't care its just that we don't want the rest of the gang to get creeped out

Riku: Yea your right we shouldn't tell them that it was

Kairi-i-love-sora: Riku don't do ---

Riku: IT WAS XENMNAS IT WAS XEMNAS!!!!!

(The kingdom hearts gang gets really pissed off and chance after Riku and Kairi-i-love-sora)

Kairi: I TOLD YOU NOT TO TELL THEM!!!!!!

Anyways about the whole gay thing I really don't care if you gay , bi , or straight…its just lots of people get offended when I write things like that so it was just for cautious measures. Oh and my friend Roxie-kun…like one of my friends. his nickname is Roxas…well I finally got him to agree to go into Victoria's Secret and act gay with my friends love interest Riku…again his nickname is Riku…there gonna act like a gay couple HA! Bu its so not fair that I have to go into Hot Topic wearing pink, white, and hot pink act completely preppy hand out flowers and saw meow at the end of every one of my sentences….and depending on what I make him do he said he's gonna add more stuff…but I really don't know what to make him do… but I told him he had to get sized for a bra….but if you have any ideas on what I should make them do pleeze let me know.

Pleeze review

Thanx4reading

Kairi-i-love-sora


	4. The Hash Sling Slasher

**Disclaimer:**I do not own Kigdom Heartsjeeze like any of us do...or the Hash slinging Slasher

in spongebob

**A/N**: Sorry It took so long to write, but I've had major writers block so yeah.

_**CaST**__le ObLI__**viOn**_

Demyx: Sora...Where are we going?

Sora: I don't know...who chose's next?

(Namine runs up to and sits on Sora's spikey head and hurts herself in the process)

Namine: CASTLE OBLIVION!!!!

Sora: Okay...

Axel: Why does she get to choose?

Sora: Cause she's sitting on my head...

Demyx: Okay good point...

(Everyone stares at Namine who is making airplane noises on Soras head.)

Sora: Namine? What the Fruit salad are you doing?

(Namine looks at everyone staring at her and pushes the drop pudding button)

Everyone: Ewwwwwwwww...

Olette: PUDDING!!!!!

(Everyone sweat drops and shakes their heads)

Riku: PUDDING FIGHT!!!

(Riku throws pudding at Sora and hits the back of his head. Causing Namine to fall off and hit the

"Eject all passengers" button. Which causes all people to flyoff of the ship and land in the world that

never was, or wherever Castle Oblivion is and the gummi ship exploded causing pudding to rain

down upon them all)

Roxas:...Dramatic...

Kairi: So Namie-chan, why are we here?

Namine:(Bright and smiley faced) To burn It down of course.

Hayner: Well what are we waiting for!?!

Pence: Oooohhh wait, I have a story to set the mood.

(Everyone strares)

Pence: Okay everyone, sit down while itell you the story of the HashSlinging Slasher!!!

(Lightning cracks and every gets quiet. But its still raining pudding so...)

Pence: Years ago, at this very castle, there was a Keyblade master. Just. Like. You.

(Pence points at Sora)

Demyx: But I'm not a Keyblade master...

Pence: Fine, he was a Keyblade master Sitar player. Just. Like.You.

Kairi: But I'm not a Keyblade bearing Sitar player...

Pence: Fine, he was a Keyblade master/Princess of Heart/ Sitar player. Just. Like. You.

Riku: But--

(Pence throws his hands up)

Pence: Fine you know what! He was a Keyblade bearing/Sitar player/ Princess of Heart/Pyro Maniac/

Memory Witch/ Dark Emo Guy/ Pudding Lover/ Keyblade Other/ Drug Dealer. Just. Like.You.

Only clumsier!

(Lightning cracks and everyone screams)

Kairi: But he'd be dead with all our clumsieness.

Pence:(nods) And one day when he was doing...all..the things you guys do..., it happened.

(Lightning cracks)

Namine: He broke his crayon?!?

Pence: No, he-

Hayner: He ran out of drugs?!?!

(Hayner quickly grabshis drugs and runs up a tree like a squirrel(Mina: Hayner you dumbass. Riku: Your writing this

you idiot! Mina: Do you want to get hit on again?!? Next time it wontbe a replacment for you. Riku: NO!!!!!!))

Pence: (Stares) NOO!! He-

Sora: Lost his spikey hair?!

(Pence rubs his temples)

Pence: No he cut off his owm hand by mistake!!!

(everyone screams)

Axel: You mean like this?

(he pulls off his arm...dumbass)

Namine & Kairi: AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

HHHHHHHHHHHHHH

(Axel's arm grows back and everyone stares,...what you didn't think I'd leave him armless

did you)

Axel: What?

Pence:...Nevermind...And he replaced it witha rusty spatula.

Namine: Why a spatula?

Pence: Because he got hit by a bus.

Roxas: Whats a bus?

Sora: I have no idea...

Pence: And so on his funeral they fired him!

Everyone: AAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

Kairi: You cant fire a princess silly!

Namine: How do you fire an emo guy?

(Namine imitates Pence)

Namine: Emo guy your fired(points at Kairi)

Kairi: Noooo how am I going to get my eyeliner at half price!!! I need this job!!!

(Pence sweatdrops)

Pence: So every...what night is it?

Olette: Tuesday night.

Pence:(nods) Every Tuesday night he comes to seek his horrible vengance!!

Riku: But tonight's tuesday night!!

(Hides behind Demyx)

Axel: How will we know?

Pence: There are three signs. First, the lights will flicker on and off. Next the phone will ring and there will

be noboby there. Then--

Demyx: Dudes can you pass the marshmallows?

Axel: Here you gon (hands him the marshmallows)

Pence: Then he will arrive in the ghost of the bus that ran him over!!!

Demyx: How can a bus have a ghost?

Axel: Why cant it? We don't even know what it is?

Demyx; Well I feel that we're not sure that its truely alive so why should we assume it has a soul?

Axel: True, very true(nods) Cause when you assume you make an ass out of you and me.

(Everyone stares as Axel and Demyx have a philisophical conversation on busses and souls)

Pence:(sighs) then do you want to know what he does next?

(Everyone nods...well except hayner whos still acting like a squirrel, and Demyx and Axel who are now talking about

hayner andthe morals he must have to do his drugs...)

Pence: Are you sure you want to know?

Kairi: Yessss.

Pence:Are you really sure???

Everyone: Tell us already!!!!!!

Pence: Well, He GETS YOU!!!!!!!!

Everyone:AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH  
HHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Pence:(bright and smiley) Okay everyone now we can go in!

(Everyone nods slowly)

Pence: Lets go!!

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Mina: Sorry it took so long to post, I'm really really really sorry su. I really hoped you likes it su! I finished at midnight on New Years

WHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO. They will be going in the castle su. In

the next chapter so i promise to update faster su. My new years revolution su!! i won't let you down su!!

thanx4reading

kairi-i-love-sora


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